tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-52215251873532634842024-03-14T09:41:52.717-07:00Normal is OverratedMusings from an imperfectly perfect life.Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-42632856981318998422018-05-11T00:43:00.000-07:002018-05-11T00:43:26.609-07:00Celebrating an Unconventional Beautiful Mother's Day <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
The Mother's Day weekend began early this year. On Thursday afternoon, after wheeling Cody into the house from his school bus ride home I noticed a gift bag hanging on the side of his chair. I had a heads up because his teacher had texted me earlier in the day that they were working on Mother's Day gifts in class. I held up the gift bag decorated with stickers and asked if it was for me. Cody got extremely excited. I asked him if he wanted me to open the gift even though Mother's Day was days away. I held up one hand for "yes" and the other for "no." Cody was so enthusiastic when he selected yes he was rocking in his chair. I first opened the card that read Happy Mother's Day on it and he laughed. I then had him help me pull the tissue paper out of the gift bag that revealed a picture of him on an easel. The pure joy Cody displayed in giving this gift was unlike I had ever seen. His pure joy in giving the present is my favorite part of his gift. I may or may not have teared up.<br />
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From the time I was very young and even before I received my first beloved "baby alive" doll, I had it in my heart of hearts to be a mother one day. It's been 24 years since I celebrated my first mother's day with Hannah. This is my 17th year celebrating with Cody as well. </div>
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If I had seen into our future what my motherhood role would look like I would have had a great deal of trepidation. This is not the conventional ideal I had envisioned. Those early days were filled with uncertainty of Cody's survival, then developmental delays, a diagnosis followed, therapies, surgery, his pain, seizures, ER visits, balancing motherhood duties and often being concerned of the time/energy/resources required with one child over the other. I'm grateful I never had that glimpse into the future because it would not have shown the whole picture. Both of my kids (now one is an adult) are a perfect addition to our family. </div>
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No one lives out a complete "conventional" picture of what they envisioned for motherhood/parenthood. Those glossy pics in the parenting magazines I read when I was first pregnant with Hannah weren't completely accurate. Motherhood for any child (typically developing or not) includes both the beautiful aspects as well as challenges for each unique child. I often say that parenting is not for wimps. I think that would make a great t-shirt. All children have "special needs". </div>
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I wish all of you moms a wonderful Mother's Day every day of the year!! <span id="goog_1723473110"></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One of my greatest gifts from one of my greatest gifts. </td></tr>
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-34919204698823408352015-06-09T17:18:00.001-07:002015-06-18T07:03:53.810-07:00The Heart Break and Mending of Medical Negligence<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I've started and stopped writing this post numerous times. I'm not sure that anyone will ever read it but it's cathartic to write. There have been days that I felt that the weight of this would be the making or breaking of me. I've determined it to NOT be the breaking. The cause of Cody's disabilities was the medical negligence of others. I can't be specific in that regard for legal purposes.<br />
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Parents of special needs children come by their role because of a myriad of causes. Some are by a genetic disorder, hereditary factors, environmental causes, deficiencies, accidents, and many are unknown. Regardless of the origin, it's equally difficult to accept. The fact that Cody's cerebral palsy diagnosis could have been easily prevented is a part of our family's journey. It's a journey shared with other families of children with special needs as well.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Here are some lessons I've learned (and continuing to learn) along the way:</b></span><br />
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1. <b>Forgiveness is the most difficult and necessary tool in (any) life.</b> I have to consciously and repeatedly forgive those responsible ESPECIALLY in those moments and days that are most challenging. On the days that Cody has had a seizure, experienced severe pain/a difficult medical procedure, planning his future, been slighted by others... it's hard to not feel the injustice for our boy and family. I confess that some of these difficult moments have been met with tears and anguish; that's when I've realized the bitterness that can incrementally creep into the heart, mind, and soul. This quote by Corrie Ten Boom speaks volumes, <i><span style="color: #351c75;">"</span></i><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><span style="color: #351c75;"><i>Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart."</i> </span>Ultimately, God has extended his forgiveness to me through Christ. Who am I not to extend forgiveness and grace when I've been forgiven of so much?</span><br />
<b>Colossians 3:13</b> <b><i>~ "Bear with each and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." </i></b></div>
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2. <b>I've discovered an empathy for others I never knew before.</b> Injustices have occurred since the beginning of mankind. I've known people throughout my life that have been victims of abuse, violence, deceit, abandonment, etc... No one gets through life unscathed of some misfortune. People have suffered because of their belief systems, ideologies, politics, race, and just for existing. I've realized even more since experiencing this with Cody that compassion and empathy should transcend the differences that we have with one another.</div>
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3. <b>Praying for those you have a grievance against makes it impossible to be bitter towards them. </b>This was difficult for me at first; it's become the most liberating. I truly wish those well that have impacted our lives in this way. I pray that they can live in peace in regards to the events of that day and move on with their lives as we do as well. Nothing good could come from holding on to grudges. It only robs you of the best life you can live for yourself and others.<br />
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4. <b>The blinders have been lifted and with that we have gained wisdom.</b> Before our experiences, I had believed (almost blindly) that a person of certain medical position was nearly flawless. The truth is no one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes but granted there are some mistakes that can alter the lives of others profoundly. We gained a wisdom from this experience to respect other's opinions but ultimately you are the greatest "expert" in regards to your loved one. If you have an instinct about yourself or another as a patient.... advocate, advocate, advocate! Your instincts may be proven or disproved but it should be pursued.<br />
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5. <b>Living in the past blinds you from the good and beautiful in the present. </b> Acknowledging the negligence and dwelling on it are two very different things. Dwelling on the most painful life experiences can breed depression (I've been there), anger, and bitterness. I can't function to the best of my ability in helping Cody fulfill his potential if I'm living in the past. <br />
<i><span style="color: #674ea7;">"One day at time - that is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone and do not be troubled about the future for it is has not yet come. Live in the present and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering." ~ Ida Scott Taylor</span></i><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody's smiles are awesome. </td></tr>
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-8429138762538352012014-11-08T12:58:00.000-08:002014-11-08T13:10:24.685-08:00PTSD and The Special Needs Parent<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It has been 13 years but I often find myself still on that hospital bed. I have dreams and flashbacks. I suddenly feel claustrophobic; I find it hard to breathe. I'm frightened for my son and myself. I want to speak; I want to SHOUT but I lose consciousness. I awaken to discover myself in the hallway being transported into the operating room. I've lost a great deal of blood. My thoughts are of Cody, the son that I have yet to see ... our baby that his dad and I named months ago. I awaken as the the doctor is beginning the caesarean. The scalpel make its initial slice into my abdomen; I can see the reflection of this in the doctor's glasses. In and out of consciousness, I begin to pray. I pray loudly for Cody.<br />
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He is rushed to the right hand corner of the room. There is no crying. I can only hear the hurried actions of hospital personnel. Minutes tick by and still nothing. Finally, I hear a faint cry. I don't know how much time transpired but he is then held next me to my on my right hand side. He's all bundled in a pink, blue and white generic hospital blanket. I don't remember the person holding my son; I can only envision the hands and arms. I look into his beautiful face. He looks so much likes his older sister. His eyes are open. I again lose consciousness.<br />
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It's PTSD - post traumatic stress disorder. It's often spoken of in relation to veterans and the battles they have been a part. For more info on PTSD: <a href="http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20022540">http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20022540</a> There has been a great deal of research that has found parents of children with special needs have stress levels comparable to those in combat. I may not have believed that if I had not experienced it for myself.<br />
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The symptoms have never gone away completely but the severity of living with that day comes and goes. This is the second period of time that it has been most difficult. I believe the reason stems from some challenges we are currently facing and as Cody is transitioning into his adolescence.<br />
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I'm not sharing this for sympathy but to share the story to hopefully be a help to others. I encourage any parent dealing with depression, anxiety, PTSD symptoms that you are not alone. If you are struggling, seek help. Help can come from a myriad of resources. Personally, therapy has been a great help for me. Also, for me it's a personal relationship with God.<br />
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As our children with profound disabilities age, there are great joys but also grief mixed in as well. It's a different kind of grief. It's heart wrenching at times to see Cody struggle with his body. It's also a great source of encouragement that he never gives up. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOoKsitrVz7v5_9-HuZ8TkKAp0O4v2s476TAYRvnWtnJtPw7b-h2Tg4Kd_jUSRbdFkl431Zuz7edO_w9UfsRdBsWcZbLRSEBXBxputs7rNgfORp00-1k5C2zQMCjtSW_BA4v_D7fQtwF8/s1600/10300238_10204745145418526_4907700076416905457_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOoKsitrVz7v5_9-HuZ8TkKAp0O4v2s476TAYRvnWtnJtPw7b-h2Tg4Kd_jUSRbdFkl431Zuz7edO_w9UfsRdBsWcZbLRSEBXBxputs7rNgfORp00-1k5C2zQMCjtSW_BA4v_D7fQtwF8/s1600/10300238_10204745145418526_4907700076416905457_n.jpg" height="320" width="319" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My two children in a candid pic. I'm a grateful mom. </td></tr>
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-25462358656762928612014-06-16T00:27:00.002-07:002015-06-19T16:39:45.396-07:00Exceptional Fathers <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Yesterday countless people celebrated their fathers and father figures.<br />
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My Dad was the only male in the household of three daughters and our mother. Many of our pets were even females. He was grossly outnumbered! I distinctly recall a phone call I had made to my Dad when Cody was about twelve months old. It was apparent to me that he was having significant developmental delays. I had taken him to his pediatrician and also had a couple physical therapy appointments. They were all cautiously optimistic in spite of his obvious delays and traumatic entry into the world. My instincts were telling me that he would have lasting effects from his initial brain injury. I was prayerful and hopeful that would not be the case; I believe God was preparing me for what was to come.<br />
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I was experiencing a great deal of trepidation of Cody's possible prognosis. I picked up the phone and called my dad. The call went something like this:<br />
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<b>Dad:</b> <i>"Hello"</i><br />
<b>Me:</b> <i>"Hey Dad."</i> My voice broke because I was on the verge of tears. Sensing that I was on the verge of tears... Dad quickly says,<br />
<b>Dad:</b> <i>"Your mother is not here."</i> (That memory makes me laugh).<br />
<b>Me:</b> <i>"I know. I think that Cody is going to have some significant issues with his development, Dad. I believe that you will tell me not necessarily what I want to hear...that everything is OK. I just really want to hear from you, my Father, that you believe that I can do this."</i> (serious sobbing)<br />
<b>Dad:</b> Silence. I'm beginning to wonder if he was still there. He answers with a firm voice, <i>"I don't have any doubt, Ann Marie. You and Scott can do this." </i><br />
That was a direct quote. It's been 12 years and I remember like it was yesterday. I needed my Dad in that moment to tell me something affirming. He was an extension of my Heavenly Father as well.<br />
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Dad has become a great source of love, fun, and encouragement for Cody. He selects the name "Grandpop" more than any other on his communication device. Cody is hands down Dad's greatest fan!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguBrjLopOoGcaKdUr7LsVZ6Scrl7nGsgxT8sGghQulFXKfgkvaX9H_kuO-Ef9xVL-QSYXjF5ljsjTr-dNgfylsUn5LvOV1bA5W3AsGPGmuyfZtOCuGjy7cdanm18tNjR_ROeq0acI35fQ/s1600/778746_10200491468839270_919485188_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguBrjLopOoGcaKdUr7LsVZ6Scrl7nGsgxT8sGghQulFXKfgkvaX9H_kuO-Ef9xVL-QSYXjF5ljsjTr-dNgfylsUn5LvOV1bA5W3AsGPGmuyfZtOCuGjy7cdanm18tNjR_ROeq0acI35fQ/s1600/778746_10200491468839270_919485188_o.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b>A typical Grandpop/Cody moment. </b></td></tr>
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The 2nd name that is most widely recited on his device is "Daddy." Scott is such an amazing support to his boy. Scott has become his arms and legs in hitting the ball and running the bases on his Dream League baseball team. He has also become his arms and legs in life. He works unbelievably hard to modify sporting activities so Cody can take part to the best of his ability. Cody may be non-verbal but the second he hears the door open when Scott returns home he communicates clearly that he is thrilled for his Dad to be home.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b>Father & Son</b></td></tr>
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The Dads, Grandfathers, Uncles, Father Figures are often the unsung heroes. The impact they make on children, particularly in special needs children's lives, are beyond measure to the entire family. So thankful for these exceptional fathers for their exceptional kids.<br />
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-32148540534715764072013-11-27T17:08:00.000-08:002013-11-27T17:08:20.545-08:00Thankful For Our Abnormal Normal Life <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Since we are just hours away from Thanksgiving 2013, I wanted to share thankful thoughts in being Cody's mom. <br />
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<strong><em>I'm thankful for the countless smiles and laughs.</em></strong> The more that I am around Cody and others with profound disabilities, I'm struck with the pure joy that is exhibited. There is an authenticity in their love, happiness, and a contentment in the present with little regard for the worries of tomorrow. I would love to emulate any or all of these more in my own life!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Here's an example in the fun that is Cody. I showed him how to take a "selfie." You don't have to be verbal to communicate FUN! </td></tr>
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<strong><em>I'm thankful for the peaceful moments.</em></strong> Having experienced trauma from the beginning with Cody and subsequent medical issues along the way, it makes me even more mindful and appreciative of the peaceful moments in life. I don't think I really relished in those times before. It is a gift. <br />
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<strong><em>I'm thankful for a sense of humor.</em></strong> An example is one day after a tough doctor's appointment, Cody and I went to one of his favorite fast food restaurants. A young boy came up and pointed and asked, "What happened to him?" I typically welcome those inquisitive questions but that moment wasn't a good time for me. I answered, "skiing accident." The boy seemed satisfied and walked away. Cody and I both laughed. Do I feel bad? yes, slightly but I know God understands. <br />
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<strong><em>I'm thankful for all the fabulous people we have met along the way that we may not have met otherwise.</em></strong> We've come in contact with therapists, teachers, specialists, doctors, other parents of special needs children, children and adults with disabilities, etc... Many of these folks have enriched our lives greatly. <br />
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There are countless others that I could list here but most importantly, <strong><em>I'm thankful for every moment as Cody's mom.</em></strong> <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody allowed me to get in one of his selfies. </td></tr>
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<strong><u>Happy Thanksgiving to all!</u></strong> The longer I live the more I realize that it's more than a historical holiday but an opportunity to remind me that thankfulness should be a mentality, a way of life. <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody and his dad at a recent family get together. Scott was helping him stretch his legs. P.S. Go Heels! </td></tr>
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-6786117793524115412013-03-23T09:54:00.000-07:002013-03-23T10:59:23.705-07:00CP Awareness Month ~<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This is a significant month. March is Cerebral Palsy Awareness Month and the 25th is Cerebral Palsy Awareness Day. March 20th is also our boy's birthday. It was by far the most challenging day in our family's life as well as one of the most beautiful. We were given the gift that is Cody.<br />
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Our family went to a local restaurant to celebrate. I noticed a gentleman seated behind our table looking at Cody. He had a critical expression and then shifted his chair to face the opposite direction. Because of his poor motor skills, Cody typically has difficulty controlling his saliva. Eating and drinking are also quite messy. We should own stock in a napkin company! The man that had shifted his chair seemed to be disapproving of Cody's table manners. </div>
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Cody seemed completely unaware but I was hurt. I remembered reading this past summer of a family in Texas that were frequent patrons of a local restaurant. It was made known to them that a family that had been seated in close proximity had requested to be moved to a different table because of their child with down syndrome. Apparently they were "uncomfortable." </div>
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In sharing our experience with my sister the following day, we discussed how the world lacks compassion and empathy for what it does not understand. I jokingly texted her later that there was a good chance the disapproving glare may have been as a result of <b><i>my</i></b> poor table manners. It's all about perspective: for every negative look, comment, reaction today and in the future, there are countless positive reactions. It's always easier to remember the bad instead of the good in any given circumstance.<br />
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Cerebral Palsy may be a part of Cody and our family's lives but it doesn't define him or us completely. Everyone has strengths, weaknesses, and "handicaps" both seen and unseen; we're all so much more than we appear. Happy CP Awareness Month!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I love this! </td></tr>
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-13648848940083959372012-03-26T19:31:00.003-07:002012-03-27T06:14:18.490-07:00Extraordinary Siblings<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I heard laughter coming over the monitor. My teenage daughter was in Cody's room. She was helping me out by getting him ready for bed. I looked at the video monitor. It showed Cody, now dressed in Toy Story pajamas, and Hannah laughing. They were both lying on his bed. Cody was teasing Hannah by trying to take off her glasses. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Their sibling relationship isn't typical. Cody and Hannah have never fought, bickered, tattled on one another. Cody never chased Hannah around the house with a daddy long-legged spider (like i once enjoyed doing to my older sister... love you, Lisa). </div><br />
Hannah was seven when Cody was born. A few weeks before Cody's birth, Hannah and I went shopping for her baby brother. She selected a Carolina blue (shout out to UNC fans) outfit, and a stuffed rabbit to give to Cody. She was excited. We all were!!<br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Cody experienced a traumatic birth with a significant amount of oxygen deprivation. He was placed on a breathing tube. Several doctors were not hopeful of his survival. Hannah was with close friends and family while Scott and I were at the hospital hoping and praying for our boy. I talked with Hannah on the phone but we waited a few days before she came to the hospital. In all honesty, I was hesitant of her arrival to the hospital because we were so uncertain of Cody's prognosis. I didn't know what to tell her. I didn't even know what to tell myself. </div><br />
After a few days, Hannah was brought to the hospital. I sat across from Hannah, face to face, on the bed. I had rehearsed in my mind how I would explain all of the happenings in recent days to my sweet girl. Those well rehearsed words failed me. I don't recall all that was said except that we all loved her little brother and he would be in God's hands.... no matter the outcome. We hoped and prayed that Cody would pull through. <br />
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I will never forget what Hannah did next. She moved closer to me and hugged me. As we hugged, she patted my back. She had never done that before. It made me chuckle a little in that she was suddenly comforting me. She then said confidently, "Cody is going to be OK." <br />
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We then walked down to the NICU so Hannah could see her brother for the first time. She had brought the little bunny that she had bought just a few weeks earlier. We put it in the corner of his incubator. As I held Cody, she spoke sweetly to her brother as she introduced herself to him. (I admit I am tearing up a little as I type this). <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hannah and Cody<br />
Summer 2001</td></tr>
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I realized in that moment that what was happening wasn't just happening to Cody, myself, Scott....but to Hannah as well. Cody's birth and life has impacted all of our lives profoundly. <br />
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Hannah's initial statement that Cody would be OK has proven to be true in many ways. Even though his cerebral palsy affects him in every area of his development, Hannah and Cody have never known anything differently in what their sibling relationship should be. In many instances that are difficult and/or challenging, children have a greater capacity to adjust. As adults, we can over-analyze and worry instead of just enjoying the present.<br />
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I've encountered many siblings of children with disabilities and/or chronic disease/conditions. These folks are in various age groups, child thru adult, and most exhibit a great capacity of compassion and empathy for others, particularly those that go unnoticed by most in society. <br />
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Cody attended an exceptional preschool years ago for children with and without special needs. We met so many wonderful families during our time at Siskin Children's Institute (http://www.siskin.org/www). I've often reflected on a conversation that I had with one of the inspiring moms that I came to know. We were discussing our concerns that we had for our children without disabilities in that much of our time was devoted to our boys with additonal needs. She then told me about a conversation she had with her lovely daughter Emma who was close to Hannah's age.<br />
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Emma had asked her mother if there was a possibility that she would have a child one day with down syndrome like her younger brother. Concluding that her daughter was anxious about the possibility of having a child of her own with down syndrome she told her that it was unlikely. Emma's response was <em>disappointment</em>. That brought tears to my eyes. Emma saw her brother as<strong> perfect</strong>!!<br />
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I've come to think of children with special needs as extraordinary. They have extraordinary siblings as well! <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEho1XLEt973Ms38x_fEwVN4ubx4YCMNwsH6wTX2960-6nPjxSgwsNYYZ3e_QJL_kynkj7T123bYviuEVIz2Dn8vvYQprL-pscSyCzEEJhyphenhyphen75TD6SBZl2kU4iysQ-N6nsH3Ac4p4bmMGNC4/s1600/madagascar+night+001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img aea="true" border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEho1XLEt973Ms38x_fEwVN4ubx4YCMNwsH6wTX2960-6nPjxSgwsNYYZ3e_QJL_kynkj7T123bYviuEVIz2Dn8vvYQprL-pscSyCzEEJhyphenhyphen75TD6SBZl2kU4iysQ-N6nsH3Ac4p4bmMGNC4/s640/madagascar+night+001.JPG" width="388" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody and Hannah in a recent candid moment. </td></tr>
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</div>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-87146267278250955972011-12-27T08:41:00.000-08:002011-12-27T12:00:57.327-08:00Lessons LearnedI'm thankful for 2011. This year has been particularly difficult and freeing. It was perhaps more challenging to me than the time of Cody's birth trauma and official diagnosis. It brought the celebration of Cody's tenth year of life. In both the months leading to his birthday and in the subsequent months, it was bittersweet. The <em>bitter</em> in that as his tenth birthday approached, the realization how quickly time had flown and in many aspects that Cody's life in the present/future and as a caregiver/parent becomes more arduous. The <em>sweet</em> is in the deep gratitude for EVERY day of Cody's life. He possesses the greatest attitude of everyone I know (happy 99% of the time), his perseverance, and appreciating each day as it comes.....<br />
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Here are some of my most valuable lessons......<br />
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1. <strong><em>I'm learning to be less offendable.</em></strong> If you know me at all, you know that I am not a fan of the word "retard" and also "jokes" pertaining to those with disabilities such as the common "short bus" anecdotes. I do feel a sense of responsibility in communicating to others not only about the words themselves but the attitudes behind them. I also realize that most people do not intend to be hurtful. The time that a tween boy at the mall used the word "retard" when he spotted Cody hurt terribly but has also taught me a valuable lesson. I need to let some things go....I will never be able to change and/or control the entire world in how my boy is perceived. I just need to concentrate on the day to day as Cody (and Hannah's) mom. That perspective is liberating! <br />
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2. <strong><em>The internet is a blessing and a curse.</em></strong> I have a friend that jokes that regardless what simple ailment she or a family member possesses that after a considerable amount of time spent on medical sites, she believes that it is likely fatal. I am a proponent for gathering as much information in regards to treatments, therapy, surgeries, and so on..... but there are times that too much information can be overwhelming! I'm learning to do the research, take a break to digest the information, and then consult with Cody's entourage (doctors, teachers, therapists, etc), repeat... :)<br />
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3. <strong><em>A parent with a special needs (or typical) child is their child's greatest "expert."</em></strong> The doctors, specialists, therapists, and other professionals in your child's life aren't always "experts" on <em>everything</em> that is your child. I've learned over the years that CP (like every other disability or condition) presents itself differently in each unique individual. There have been times that these great folks working with and for your child will differ in opinion. Ultimately you are the "coach" of the team and you need to make the call. Perhaps your call wasn't the best play so you go to plan b, c, d, and so on.... (My sad analogy comes from years of marriage to an avid sports enthusiast).<br />
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4. <b><i>I'm not a naturally confrontational person but had to develop that to better advocate for my son.</i></b> I took a personality test in my early twenties; the<strong><u> D</u></strong> - dominant personality trait hardly registered. Life experiences/changes will typically alter the personality test results for everyone but this definitely occurred after Cody's birth for me. A prime example of developing that confrontational edge is with the insurance companies. Insurance companies routinely deny coverage for services, equipment, and treatments with the phrase <strong>"not a medical necessity"</strong> attached. The key is to appeal that via letters from doctors, teachers, therapists and making a case personally to an individual of position from the insurance company. I like to think of myself first as "the polite squeaky wheel" and if the <strong><em>polite</em></strong> doesn't work....just <strong><em><u>squeaky!</u></em></strong><br />
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5. <strong><em>I'm inspired by others</em></strong>. When you have a child with disabilities you become a member of a club that no one would ever sign up for but after you're in it for a while, you greatly appreciate the extra-ordinary individuals that you may have never met otherwise. I've met children and adults with disabilities and their families that inspire me greatly. We're all on our own unique journey; we can learn from others in their challenges and triumphs. Communication with other parents of children with disabilities/chronic conditions is invaluable. Often I'm reminded that at any given time that someone else always has it more difficult. <br />
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6. <strong><em>I've had to allow myself to grieve not only for Cody but for me as his mom.</em></strong> It's OK to be somewhat sad as others share their child's athletic prowess. It's understandable to rejoice with them while at the same time feeling a sense of unfairness for your child. It's rather amusing that I can be slightly envious as a mom complains how "Johnny" has made a huge mess, climbing the bookshelf, or won't stop talking. It can be heartbreaking observing Cody when he's frustrated with his own body. I've had to make a decision to allow myself to feel that way for a minute and then just do the next thing.<br />
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7. <strong><em>Faith, Trust, and Planning</em></strong> My greatest apprehension is Cody's future when I unable to care for him. I think that this vulnerability is felt by every parent no matter the capabilities of the child. I know that as much as I love and care for Cody that God's love for him is even greater. I also know that as Cody has already exceeded so many expectations since his birth he will continue. I'd rather have high expectations for Cody so he may aspire to meet them than to have little or no hope. My motto is to hope and pray for the best but plan based on the realities of today. Planning for your child that most likely will have to live dependently on others is a daunting and necessary task. <br />
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8. <strong><em>Be good to yourself</em></strong> Often I feel like I can never do enough to be of help to Cody but I'm learning that there are times that extending grace to myself is very important. This can take different forms for everyone depending on your interests. I enjoy reading, photography, (ATTEMPTING at) being crafty, etc..... <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">9. <strong><em>Sense of humor is key!</em></strong> I come from a long line of goofy. :) The ability to see the humor in life truly helps in surviving the most difficult aspects. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The close of 2011....<br />
Christmas Eve </td></tr>
</tbody></table>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-22522355747293077382011-11-26T20:41:00.000-08:002011-11-26T22:09:03.766-08:00Hats (or Ears) Off to Disney<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Last month we spent our fall break at Disney World. Undoubtedly you've heard the rumor that Disney is "the happiest place on earth." I call it "the most accessible place on earth." <br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><u>We began our time at Disney equipped with these very useful tools:</u></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWw6mzJ5npetNScR6qLxm62N65ZNt1dVCAR59rD0UTGntKqrxQvDMswZB1SHkD3ZQUgc1P9Q5fcfl__IWiotggAgjdnJIPInfxIqI8A1qdFQkBormKNnE1cgZQtFM2d4noC1MYrxa6AEQ/s1600/304062_2697615369627_1533909726_32869968_236725292_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWw6mzJ5npetNScR6qLxm62N65ZNt1dVCAR59rD0UTGntKqrxQvDMswZB1SHkD3ZQUgc1P9Q5fcfl__IWiotggAgjdnJIPInfxIqI8A1qdFQkBormKNnE1cgZQtFM2d4noC1MYrxa6AEQ/s200/304062_2697615369627_1533909726_32869968_236725292_n.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> <strong><em>This is our well-worn Guest Assistance Card. It enabled Cody and his entourage (hipper than saying family) almost immediate entrance to rides, shows, etc.</em></strong></div> <strong><em></em></strong><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEjO8f56voqBvuQ_cvrsf7vX3fuar_gK8nOfGKMUs5iiVKd6JBmooXwZYBdC3zKPYLr27hGmgvIPO29zsgd0F_Tr0svg9zXwlFVywXsfO1AwlD_dUSCZmEmKnuky-gBoLNQxYGesz-KMk/s1600/disability+map+dw.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEjO8f56voqBvuQ_cvrsf7vX3fuar_gK8nOfGKMUs5iiVKd6JBmooXwZYBdC3zKPYLr27hGmgvIPO29zsgd0F_Tr0svg9zXwlFVywXsfO1AwlD_dUSCZmEmKnuky-gBoLNQxYGesz-KMk/s320/disability+map+dw.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><strong><em>A Disney "cast member" (aka: employee) directed me to the disability maps. This cast member was one of many that we met with disabilities (which speaks volumes). The maps clearly identifies the wheelchair accessible rides. </em></strong></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> <br />
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<strong><u> Cody is introduced to the Toy Story ride at Magic Kingdom: </u></strong><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1oRHzlEmoF3W1j-lN9aIostVsKjl0nHtPFQcVfCRPrVooW5qjXvBNT3cGAyNX8WSIToHNfyTtWjqYDypXWir_6HERpFrZpGJX1nCLPCQmM5I45s5rCq-yT8OMD49s-NuAyYyiyfm6G3Y/s1600/cody+ts+ride.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1oRHzlEmoF3W1j-lN9aIostVsKjl0nHtPFQcVfCRPrVooW5qjXvBNT3cGAyNX8WSIToHNfyTtWjqYDypXWir_6HERpFrZpGJX1nCLPCQmM5I45s5rCq-yT8OMD49s-NuAyYyiyfm6G3Y/s320/cody+ts+ride.jpg" width="239" /></a></div> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><em>The attention to detail to make these rides accessible is greatly appreciated. The cast members throughout Disney were very accommodating and sincere in their attention to Cody. This mom couldn't ask for more! </em></strong></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><u>Cody (and the rest of us) enjoyed the ride so much we had to ride it again....this time with Grandpop!! </u></strong><br />
<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjrbdaWAi8STNbmMW2YpAZWRh7yStyEg2-WyakjftZQiwcgEJmJGFwJVOPQzGr2K3N1bqWm32D2OGOvoXEfei-bxwJoJHnE1D5lsoFH95hqA9yPmqIIeLoLnHVnmSfGFkcqkbePopEndQ/s1600/293583_2505392764182_1533909726_32760094_699049414_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjrbdaWAi8STNbmMW2YpAZWRh7yStyEg2-WyakjftZQiwcgEJmJGFwJVOPQzGr2K3N1bqWm32D2OGOvoXEfei-bxwJoJHnE1D5lsoFH95hqA9yPmqIIeLoLnHVnmSfGFkcqkbePopEndQ/s200/293583_2505392764182_1533909726_32760094_699049414_n.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisJXEwIkjaip9wLRI3MBkmKTHs09MjphprB7II6O5NE6pXKjN8XXgjPpyQhLT1y66RU0tLuyxQ7umSKlcsyz3L66dml7sQTJT6nkRg1gWM04epAHXMJEBdq2mDkEP_O4HvPydXNhp2XUA/s1600/299003_2505386604028_1533909726_32760090_1380191563_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisJXEwIkjaip9wLRI3MBkmKTHs09MjphprB7II6O5NE6pXKjN8XXgjPpyQhLT1y66RU0tLuyxQ7umSKlcsyz3L66dml7sQTJT6nkRg1gWM04epAHXMJEBdq2mDkEP_O4HvPydXNhp2XUA/s200/299003_2505386604028_1533909726_32760090_1380191563_n.jpg" width="149" /></a></div><em>Here's an example how I shouldn't underestimate Cody. I sincerely didn't think he would would enjoy the Aladdin-magic carpet ride. I was concerned that he would be frightened. Just take a look at the pictures.... I was wrrrrrrrrr-ooooonnnggg (to be read with your best Fonzie impersonation). </em><br />
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</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><em>Guests with Disabilities are the first to board rides. Typically, people with special needs are considered as an afterthought. </em></strong></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixE6XA1Y1fSKjoVmCWkK6JgsTI3yQVJQvVhi9bWK_1HVL9euX3EPU5m5uHMk8NJlaKeF3mAxr578ah_sGFr210qRP3euJ6GRK5yr67ajqvDaPgO-f6V9Rtm9rzqeS9mG84eL3AT3VzodI/s1600/wdw+happy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixE6XA1Y1fSKjoVmCWkK6JgsTI3yQVJQvVhi9bWK_1HVL9euX3EPU5m5uHMk8NJlaKeF3mAxr578ah_sGFr210qRP3euJ6GRK5yr67ajqvDaPgO-f6V9Rtm9rzqeS9mG84eL3AT3VzodI/s320/wdw+happy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<strong><em>Could he look any happier??? </em></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><u>Here are a few other highlights:</u></strong><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirIKdQ0l8A1S9kN2tuEkGJPVMZP-MeT2vuDWyEhUd5UehMGk8q1zBfc-qYlkA9N_jxajTZ-Mb4sIkt2fYpR3DJ4UBulC9lJ73GfgwF5DZxfDg35jrxIaXK82hXocHUvy5wnJ0T1qvBGCU/s1600/cody+safari.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><strong><img border="0" hda="true" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirIKdQ0l8A1S9kN2tuEkGJPVMZP-MeT2vuDWyEhUd5UehMGk8q1zBfc-qYlkA9N_jxajTZ-Mb4sIkt2fYpR3DJ4UBulC9lJ73GfgwF5DZxfDg35jrxIaXK82hXocHUvy5wnJ0T1qvBGCU/s320/cody+safari.jpg" width="239" /></strong></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><em>Cody enjoying the Kilimanjaro Safari at Animal Kingdom.</em></strong> </div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdd51_Cf8duHJCdAqZaz0TUhm9d4aZctEfKHTZZ1e8ZRqG-UUe28VDDGnZlTj197npuDcGeEwMpUiZaMInL8JYkK_EsLuMA6bEWpYwx8idfPBN7-vuheLSceROquUhX-kwrclcgl4MWJU/s1600/wdw+hannah+and+cody.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdd51_Cf8duHJCdAqZaz0TUhm9d4aZctEfKHTZZ1e8ZRqG-UUe28VDDGnZlTj197npuDcGeEwMpUiZaMInL8JYkK_EsLuMA6bEWpYwx8idfPBN7-vuheLSceROquUhX-kwrclcgl4MWJU/s320/wdw+hannah+and+cody.jpg" width="239" /></a></div> <br />
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<strong><em>Three of my favorite characters. </em></strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5SvKXW4yPVdGUlsFXvvX5xtzGg_jpUHl_dtJ_XDrmVOsfQLVnbbgn1ZKDB3hjkoRVwdf38bKhM4tA7Mpz62GfAnbohzwZxzjiDzxrc0-2JYuh-xtYSYPnWFUkb8kJhNPSsg_VTVHAHto/s1600/cody+and+woody.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5SvKXW4yPVdGUlsFXvvX5xtzGg_jpUHl_dtJ_XDrmVOsfQLVnbbgn1ZKDB3hjkoRVwdf38bKhM4tA7Mpz62GfAnbohzwZxzjiDzxrc0-2JYuh-xtYSYPnWFUkb8kJhNPSsg_VTVHAHto/s640/cody+and+woody.jpg" width="478" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><strong>The pièce de résistance</strong> <strong> of our trip ..... Cody meeting Woody.</strong> </td></tr>
</tbody></table>I readily admit that this mom teared up a time or two during our week at Disney. Often, attractions that we visit advertise that they are "handicap accessible" but in actuality it means that they have sidewalks....not that they have accessible activities for those in wheelchairs or other medical equipment. Witnessing Cody being able to be A PART of all the fun and the joy that he had was amazing. </div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: #eeeeee;"></span></div>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-43574288924457056312011-10-07T12:25:00.000-07:002013-04-17T18:55:56.702-07:00Wrestling With God<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
There are a lot of blessings in having a child with disabilities. It has changed my perspective drastically and wonderfully. Since Cody's birth, I don't worry as much about the "little things." In our household, there's no such thing as a small miracle; we celebrate the most minuscule of developmental accomplishments!<br />
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I also have times that are especially trying and strangely it isn't in the "bigger"/traumatic events such as surgery, seizures, etc... It's often in the smaller things such as noticing a pained expression on Cody's face because of his spasticity, his frustration with his body, or not being able to easily communicate his wants and needs.<br />
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I often think back to a conversation that I had with my mother when I was about ten or eleven. I remember beginning with, "I think I am an atheist." I had told her that I had come to the conclusion that God couldn't exist and I had several reasons to make my case. I distinctly recall this point... How could there be a God when there was so much suffering in the world, particularly with children?? (I was basing this on a recent trip we had taken to visit family out of state which included a day spent at Six Flags. Also visiting that day, was a school of children with disabilities. I recalled feeling such empathy and a sense of unfairness for my peers. This wasn't a very common sight back then. It was long before the Americans with Disabilities Act; inclusion did not exist as it does today).<br />
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Happy to report that nearly a decade later, I changed my opinion and became a Christian in 1989. It has proven to be my greatest personal decision. <br />
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We've experienced the miraculous in the fact that Cody is alive today; he survived nearly twelve minutes without oxygen. One of the first: a nurse practitioner whose shift ended for the day, was leaving the hospital when she heard the STAT call as we were heading into the operating room. Days after the delivery, she came to me as Cody continued his fight in the NICU. She told me that as she entered the room, the neonatal doctors and nurses were gathered around Cody after the 2nd attempt to revive him. She then prefaced the rest of her involvement with, "I am not a religious person. I've never been a believer in God but I heard an audible voice say, 'Try one more time." She convinced the others in the room to try once more to resuscitate Cody; they were within seconds of pronouncing his death. They did try once more....and he breathed. I'm indebted to her and the Lord. <br />
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Cody's struggles were not over. He began to experience seizure activity and was placed on a breathing tube. The first neurologist was very doubtful of his survival without the tube; his initial MRI was not promising. Six days following, he was taken off of the breathing tube and was breathing just fine...TAKE THAT BRAIN INJURY! The following five weeks in the NICU were challenging but he continually exceeded expectations. <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody w/breathing tube. </td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The day Cody's breathing tube was removed! </td></tr>
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Several months later, a friendly acquaintance at church asked me how Cody was progressing. I had communicated to her that I was beginning to see signs of developmental delays. She responded with, "God never heals halfway." She was well meaning but that statement echoed in my mind for a long time. I thought of those first hours, days, weeks and the helplessness that I felt as a mother. I also thought of the overwhelming peace that I experienced when I resolved in my heart and mind that as Cody was not in my hands that he was in God's..... no matter the outcome. </div>
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I've had my share of "wrestling with God" days. I've had times of talking at Him...not to Him. Everyone has experienced suffering, loss, disappointment, pain, grief, etc.... I think that people (including myself) often equate suffering with God's absence but the opposite is true. <br />
Romans 8:28a, 37-39. <br />
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him. No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."<br />
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Even though there are challenging days, I've altered my childhood perspective of God and those with disabilities... because of Cody and others with disabilities that I've come to know, I see Him more clearly in their perseverance, their joy of life, (the list goes on)....... <br />
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Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-34650048384919648062011-09-16T17:39:00.000-07:002011-09-17T20:40:07.680-07:00Take Deep BreathsI know that flying on an airplane terrifies many people. I was once on a flight from DFW to RDU with my then four year old daughter and we happened to be sitting across the aisle from a young woman; she had her nausea bag clutched tightly in her hands almost the entire flight. I was relieved when we landed without incident and her color turned from a greenish hue to a more natural skin tone. Hannah later asked why the lady held that bag and I explained that she must have been nervous. She could not understand why anyone would be nervous flying; she thought of it as a WONDERFUL adventure. Hannah loved everything about the plane...including the lavatory. I eventually had to limit our visits to the restroom once I realized that she thought of it as her personal playhouse. <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hannah at age four. </td></tr>
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I haven't flown as much in the ten years since having Cody. The main reason is that air travel isn't the most accessible and when we travel, we bring along Cody's extra equipment. I shudder to think of his equipment being "checked" and definitely not able to fit in the overhead compartments. <br />
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Typically, I'm one of a handful of passengers that actually makes eye contact with the flight attendants as they recite the safety procedures. I'm curious if anything has changed since the previous time I had flown (it rarely does). I find it odd that the majority of passengers act as if the flight attendants are invisible during this time. This is also the time that I size up the folks that have been chosen to sit near the emergency exits. ;)<br />
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Recently I was reminded of the part of the flight attendants' speech pertaining to the oxygen masks, “In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will automatically descend from the ceiling. Grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have children travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs.” To most parents, this would be against our instinctive role as a parent or caregiver. I thought of this as a perfect analogy for us as mothers (and fathers) of children with disabilities.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmt8ckN1ulDTkPG5DSg5oJf0C2drG3wjMGkxk6jO-80jeAv9z9MOPccHWWtIeTF71nCxzjf2MySbAvA1vXKt-uUo4PapA9NTahT3DQJ-A6PKylYfQKfkKRO8Vlp51LCKUncwSa6Fnn9_w/s1600/AirplaneOxygenMasks-1161.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" rba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmt8ckN1ulDTkPG5DSg5oJf0C2drG3wjMGkxk6jO-80jeAv9z9MOPccHWWtIeTF71nCxzjf2MySbAvA1vXKt-uUo4PapA9NTahT3DQJ-A6PKylYfQKfkKRO8Vlp51LCKUncwSa6Fnn9_w/s320/AirplaneOxygenMasks-1161.jpg" width="304" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cheesy/Effective oxygen mask illustration. </td></tr>
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Having a child with disabilities and/or chronic medical condition can feel as if you are on a roller coaster and constantly anticipating that next drop. The "drop" can take its form in a rush to the emergency room, a seizure, a negative reaction to a new medication, additional orthopedic complications, etc... Please understand that this roller coaster ride is also wonderful, exciting, and worth the drops. :)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLRF3q3iaR9T4XhbEBi_PSsJEXtQ4HmW8zBSn57GLX8i9umSeZYMKmWbDiBBSg-0rJmDOpsJAHBKLDMZiG8-NeZA3Bf0OGXt-hMbqps5M4fgQ9rLYEwEultvx7VloNBF2HlUTiIOytX2U/s1600/imagesCAN0HPCW.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="204" rba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLRF3q3iaR9T4XhbEBi_PSsJEXtQ4HmW8zBSn57GLX8i9umSeZYMKmWbDiBBSg-0rJmDOpsJAHBKLDMZiG8-NeZA3Bf0OGXt-hMbqps5M4fgQ9rLYEwEultvx7VloNBF2HlUTiIOytX2U/s320/imagesCAN0HPCW.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I googled "roller coaster drop"....this was an option --- PERFECT! :)</td></tr>
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I have made some friends that were first informed of their child's potential diagnosis during pregnancy. They heard words such as: down syndrome, deformity, abnormal, etc... These words echoed in their hearts and minds for months, weeks, days before delivery. Their "roller coaster" experience began before they even held their newborn in their arms. <br />
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In recent years/months, as Cody has grown (particularly in size).... I've come to recognize the importance as a caregiver of putting on that oxygen mask first. We can't give to others if we aren't taking those 'deep breaths' ourselves. Those deep breaths can take different life-giving forms depending on each unique individual. It can be in hobbies, exercise, reading (a personal fav), friendships, support from other parents w/children with disabilities, and so on...... The key is to MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF! <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh66sWH-aecq7QwylMYb93PGOYaYwpGEkQlbu8pKzzO53LLQkxbRn-K6cIxVW9Ds6Ge2SsF9UM7ZZhxayrU846hhEKgAJbZvoa7WralR6Ivd-nf11vZLMR3EQR2Ru9p2ZYD0DXh_JeVY7A/s1600/cody+waiting+for+school.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" rba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh66sWH-aecq7QwylMYb93PGOYaYwpGEkQlbu8pKzzO53LLQkxbRn-K6cIxVW9Ds6Ge2SsF9UM7ZZhxayrU846hhEKgAJbZvoa7WralR6Ivd-nf11vZLMR3EQR2Ru9p2ZYD0DXh_JeVY7A/s320/cody+waiting+for+school.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody's latest pic - today 9/16/11</td></tr>
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</div>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-87086913083136253632011-08-19T16:02:00.000-07:002011-08-19T19:58:18.082-07:00Stamp of Approval<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Forty years ago, most of the equipment for children with disabilities were yet to be created. I have a dear aunt that had told me that when her son was little and in need of a wheelchair...they simply did not exist. Her father-in-law should be inducted into the "Grandfathers Hall Of Fame" for 'making' a wheelchair for his precious grandson by adding onto a stroller. I often think of that conversation while ordering new equipment for Cody. <br />
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Cody uses a variety of equipment on a daily basis at home and at school. This blog post highlights some of the best. These get Cody's stamp of approval (mine as well):</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Until four years ago, Cody was still in a crib. I had searched for a bed that was like a hospital bed (BUT COOLER) and found the Sleep Safe Plus bed.</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyJisKx5XWIgOEMxVU3UTxLsj6utAiSq7BM7jwfe1Gsv_eIy5ZDlt7ASK1Ieh2GNlPDSisdeBGOty1Tl6WWtByvGIa11ID1CGUcLVDxfGl8YaxO7dEXqMevI210JXTIDaMNeKzwvEcnJQ/s1600/sleep+safe+bed.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" qaa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyJisKx5XWIgOEMxVU3UTxLsj6utAiSq7BM7jwfe1Gsv_eIy5ZDlt7ASK1Ieh2GNlPDSisdeBGOty1Tl6WWtByvGIa11ID1CGUcLVDxfGl8YaxO7dEXqMevI210JXTIDaMNeKzwvEcnJQ/s200/sleep+safe+bed.bmp" width="200" /></a><a href="http://www.sleepsafebed.com/Products/sleepsafe2.htm">http://www.sleepsafebed.com/Products/sleepsafe2.htm</a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">The safety rail windows enable us to view Cody as he lies in bed and he can see out. The bed has motorized controls for repositioning. The ability to raise and lower the bed makes changing his diapers and clothes so much more convenient. Before the Sleep Safe, I was forced to change him on the floor. My back is especially appreciative of the Sleep Safe bed!</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Spring 2011 we made one of the best purchases for Cody.....his very own bike! </div><a href="http://www.rifton.com/products/mobility/adaptivetricycles/index.html">http://www.rifton.com/products/mobility/adaptivetricycles/index.html</a><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkZOqRKE-RypY8iwRv5bLX0iMxv4umAdH5XJeEy5pf9CQkaqNZd0I1Ws8iUBo2dtLNOU1_hO-YHEU1dtzn6jtjFEt9AFSXtWD5dAq0fE1yvUhqTT-l5ahUc6oHpK_PQ5nky7Kg5g5wsi4/s1600/pics+085.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="188" qaa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkZOqRKE-RypY8iwRv5bLX0iMxv4umAdH5XJeEy5pf9CQkaqNZd0I1Ws8iUBo2dtLNOU1_hO-YHEU1dtzn6jtjFEt9AFSXtWD5dAq0fE1yvUhqTT-l5ahUc6oHpK_PQ5nky7Kg5g5wsi4/s200/pics+085.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
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</tbody></table>I had received a call one day from Cody's physical therapist at school. She had place Cody onto a bike and he was suddenly Lance Armstrong. I was skeptical at first since we had tried him out on various equipment and couldn't get the proper positioning for him to access the bike effectively. This was yet another example of Cody exceeding expectations. He wasn't just riding the bike....he was having a ball!! Cody now has a bike for home and school. Every child should have a bike! </div><br />
<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ6d4T4T1lbWarJ3O-Oqvi1Ki-0U184jwcoiCo2o1IWuP2oKnGl3mKZvIbNrDO3Ns6uBmBQ-Maj45tunLMWfq3IH4z0d3AfXiVKaV17vC8VKmiieyzSvazTRvvWrbMCE4Vge5plv9hsB4/s1600/ECO2-ECOP.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="195" qaa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ6d4T4T1lbWarJ3O-Oqvi1Ki-0U184jwcoiCo2o1IWuP2oKnGl3mKZvIbNrDO3Ns6uBmBQ-Maj45tunLMWfq3IH4z0d3AfXiVKaV17vC8VKmiieyzSvazTRvvWrbMCE4Vge5plv9hsB4/s200/ECO2-ECOP.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>The most recent purchase for Cody is most essential for him to have a 'voice' in this world. Cody is non-verbal. He does find ways of communicating through gestures, sounds, etc.... We've had a communication device in the past but with little success. Cody would become easily frustrated and simply turn the device off(which was humorous the FIRST time). Words can't express (perhaps I need a communication device) how thrilled we are with him utilizing his ECO 2 by Prentke Romich. <a href="https://store.prentrom.com/product_info.php/cPath/11/products_id/53">https://store.prentrom.com/product_info.php/cPath/11/products_id/53</a><br />
I believe his recent achievements with the ECO 2 is a result of updated technology, and his maturity. After a month with his new ECO 2, this is a sampling of a conversation between Cody and myself.......<br />
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</div>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-62316975962793366532011-07-27T09:15:00.000-07:002011-07-27T09:43:00.358-07:00<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkZOqRKE-RypY8iwRv5bLX0iMxv4umAdH5XJeEy5pf9CQkaqNZd0I1Ws8iUBo2dtLNOU1_hO-YHEU1dtzn6jtjFEt9AFSXtWD5dAq0fE1yvUhqTT-l5ahUc6oHpK_PQ5nky7Kg5g5wsi4/s1600/pics+085.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkZOqRKE-RypY8iwRv5bLX0iMxv4umAdH5XJeEy5pf9CQkaqNZd0I1Ws8iUBo2dtLNOU1_hO-YHEU1dtzn6jtjFEt9AFSXtWD5dAq0fE1yvUhqTT-l5ahUc6oHpK_PQ5nky7Kg5g5wsi4/s320/pics+085.JPG" t$="true" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody on his bike.... 2/14/11</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Yesterday marked the 21st anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) being signed into law. I feel the benefits of this law on a daily basis....with ramps for Cody's wheelchair, handicap parking and various services. There is still more that can be done to enable those with disabilities<em> life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.</em><br />
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Beyond the legalities for people with disabilities, there is room for improvement in attitudes toward these extraordinary individuals. As a mother of a child with multiple disabilities, I've seen that most are very kind in regards to my son. Children in particular are typically curious about Cody and his chair. I am more than willing to satisfy their curiosity. They often ask me if he has broken legs. I've made the decision some time ago to not say "cerebral palsy" when asked by young children of what "he has" because they typically butcher the pronunciation. :) I now say "C.P." because it is much easier to pronounce and I also think it sounds hipper. <br />
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Here are a few of the less than desirable attitudes and communications in regards to Cody's disabilities....<br />
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When Cody was nearly one, we visited a new church. We went to the information desk and when asked by the pleasant volunteer how old Cody was (to determine his placement during the service) I explained that our miracle son had some significant delays. His developmental age did not match his numerical age. He was not able to sit, crawl, stand, etc.... I took my then seven year old daughter to her class. The kind, grandmotherly volunteer escorted Scott, my husband, and Cody to his nursery class. <br />
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Some time later, Scott met me in the sanctuary. I knew something wasn't right; he seemed upset. Halfway through the service he told me what had transpired at the classroom door. After our communication with this gal, she introduced Scott to the classroom teacher and then said, "This is Cody. He has problems." <br />
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I'm ashamed to say that for the rest of service I allowed a dark cloud to loom over me. I heard nothing from the pulpit. Scott had to convince me to stay in the service and not make a beeline to Cody's classroom. All I could think was if Cody were to continue to have significant delays in life, I didn't want words such as "problems" to be the identifying adjectives for him. <br />
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Another instance was a few years ago when Cody was about eight years old. My parents were visiting us in the beautiful city of Chattanooga. We were enjoying a local tourist attraction. We had met several people that afternoon including a woman and her young son. As we were leaving, my dad was pushing Cody about ten steps ahead when our new acquaintance walked up beside me and pointed to dad and Cody and asked, "What's wrong with him?" I sarcastically replied, "Who? my dad?" She responded with, "your son." I answered, "absolutely nothing. Are you asking me what is his disability?" After a few moments, she was on her way.<br />
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I'm sure her intentions were good. I know in my lifetime I've said (countless) things to others that did not communicate sensitivity. <br />
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Thirdly, while shopping back-to-school deals at our local mall Cody and I passed a couple of tweenish boys. Boy A looked at Cody and then turned to Boy B and said, "retard." Boys A and B both laughed. I admit that I nearly lost my religion in that moment!! I envisioned myself turning Cody around and running over Boy A with Cody's wheelchair....leaving tire marks. <br />
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After I composed myself, I mentioned to Cody what I almost did to which he responded with laughter. He may be non-verbal.....but he is cognitively aware.<br />
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As I stated earlier, I believe that most people are well intentioned. There are still many that will continue to mock those that often times can not defend themselves. Handicap "jokes" have become ingrained in daily life and they permeate the entertainment industry. In recent years it has been a hot topic with politicians as well. I believe if most had the privilege of knowing a person with disabilities and seeing their perseverance, courage, kindness, etc....it would make all the difference. The longer I live the more I realize that we all have "disabilities" ... some are just easily seen.Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5221525187353263484.post-91798670541415701662011-07-23T13:15:00.000-07:002011-07-24T18:58:35.525-07:00Perspective<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">In recent weeks I've had two encounters with women that were humbling, touching, and even humorous. On both occasions I was reminded that perspective is everything.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">The first was a week ago with a nurse at our local pediatric hospital. My son Cody had to have dental surgery. He has cerebral palsy with a great deal of spasticity (muscle stiffness). He has been grinding his teeth to such a degree that he cracked several of his molars; the grinding is a result of his spasticity. It was a simple outpatient procedure. Nevertheless, I slept fitfully the night before. Cody has been hospitalized before for different procedures. It's never easy to see your child in the hospital for any reason; the vulnerability felt by any parent is always great. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">After the procedure, I was allowed into the recovery room. The room was open with a nurses' station in the center. Small beds lined the wall with one nurse per patient. The beeping and humming sounds of medical equipment filled the room. I felt an immediate sense of uneasiness; it was reminiscent of Cody's early days in the NICU. I made a beeline to Cody's bed. It was about that time that he started out of sedation. I found that my voice was quite shaky. It seemed I was performing my best Katharine Hepburn impersonation when I said, "Hi Honey." He was moaning but still managed to give me a groggy half-smile. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I noticed that Cody still had on his a.f.o.'s (leg braces). I asked the nurse if I could remove them because he can be quite uncomfortable with them while laying down. I noticed that when I mentioned "a.f.o.'s" the nurse that was caring for the patient in the bed next to Cody looked up at us. As I began removing Cody's shoes and braces the nurse said, "I am familiar with those....we've had them for my son." I asked her how old her son was and she replied, "He passed away four years ago." I felt badly for her...I made a weak (and sincere) apology. Later, she tapped me on the shoulder and said, "I don't want you to feel bad... seeing you and your son, today, was a very good memory for me." We both had tears in our eyes. I don't even know her name. It was such a reminder to enjoy every day as best you can in spite of the challenges. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">My second perspective check was on the fourth of July. We were celebrating at our home with extended family. We also had very special guests; our neighbors that live almost a mile on our road. I had never met them before but in recent months had become very acquainted with them. With the devastating tornadoes that broke out on April 27th, 2011....these neighbors (along with many others in our community) loss their beautiful home. They all survived but not without injuries. The wife/mother sustained broken bones and collapsed lung. They shared the harrowing details of the moments before, during, and following of their home being obliterated around them. </span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHjTPNlK9IJnBLAij-4GPNONXdFJoNy5s7iCBeH0-FTcHUE8iG7Rst3848NzjqaQ9N7VcrNWxMSiFZsTflxAIZbEeGYzj9OsHRF8SHReiWSFC8RkQhwX77OschQJT2sWu2hYXdbgN6j5A/s1600/cody+recovering.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHjTPNlK9IJnBLAij-4GPNONXdFJoNy5s7iCBeH0-FTcHUE8iG7Rst3848NzjqaQ9N7VcrNWxMSiFZsTflxAIZbEeGYzj9OsHRF8SHReiWSFC8RkQhwX77OschQJT2sWu2hYXdbgN6j5A/s320/cody+recovering.jpg" t$="true" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cody recovering nicely with his pal, "Bunny." </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjH1Wddn1wBLAIvft9Oe5hyfTFwWyI_NrGghNH6dlztxFHhT2zJYE0jdoipmdPxDrdEvfHlTyql14mfUUP63whcPtH_EiqKuy4G_DrWIhNDTZ0AbPMMc4I4_GTqOqF0J-3fW4vk7Pd7F8/s1600/tornado+damage+colby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjH1Wddn1wBLAIvft9Oe5hyfTFwWyI_NrGghNH6dlztxFHhT2zJYE0jdoipmdPxDrdEvfHlTyql14mfUUP63whcPtH_EiqKuy4G_DrWIhNDTZ0AbPMMc4I4_GTqOqF0J-3fW4vk7Pd7F8/s320/tornado+damage+colby.jpg" t$="true" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our neighbors' home the day after the tornado. </td></tr>
</tbody></table> <span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">They had dropped by because they were beginning the process of choosing a house plan to rebuild; they were interested in building a home similar to ours. As I gave them a tour of the house I explained, "please excuse the mess; we have a lot of company right now." She responded with, 'You should see my house. It looks like a tornado hit it." Her husband than said, "God downsized us." I love people with a sense of humor! Surely they will grieve the "things" that they loss and their beautiful home but they have such grace in their circumstances. Less than a mile, there were four deaths in a home that also took a direct hit. The only survivor was an eight year old boy that was found about 1/2 mile from his grandmother's house. Life is fragile and beautiful. </span><br />
<a name='more'></a>Annie Stewarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10865942118925128333noreply@blogger.com3